Taking the Oath of Office

"Off we go into the wild blue yonder,
Climbing high into the sun;
Here they come zooming to meet our thunder,
At 'em boys, Give 'er the gun! (Give 'er the gun now!)
Down we dive, spouting our flame from under,
Off with one helluva roar!
We live in fame or go down in flame. Hey!
Nothing'll stop the U.S. Air Force!"

The childhood memories of dressing up in Grandpa Merl's Marine garb are vivid. In the basement of his house was a lone room; and in that lone room was a closet; and behind that closet door lay hours of dress-up fun. So many outfits to wear, and so many battles to win! Given my size, I was not going to beat the enemy (my brother and, often times, cousins) on sheer strength but on stratagem. Even back then, my romanticization of the heroics of war was not entirely found in the bloodbath that often occupies it, but mostly in the fight for the cause that is bigger than life itself, namely, that of freedom!

Now fast forward some 10 or so years to Fort Hamilton, Brooklyn, NY (1995): Just after moving to New York, I found myself walking in to the recruiting office on Amsterdam Avenue & 65th Street to complete what I had already started in Salt Lake. After a fine display of my acrobatic abilities (i.e., jumping through a mess load of red tape), I was finally given clearance to enlist in the active reserve Army. After a dreadfully long day at MEPS in Fort Hamilton, I clearly recall the awful feeling that came over me when reviewing my contract. It was palpable, unbearable, making my stomach twist and turn and cramp up inside. It was a feeling devoid of all excitement and adventure; yet, it was filled with a caveat and regret. When I asked the officer that sat across from me on the other side of the desk if I could have some time -- just a day or two -- to mull it over before signing, he assured me that if I did not sign now I would not sign at all. He was right . . . and yet he was wrong!


Fulfilling my latent and childhood desire to serve my country, yesterday I swore to "support and defend the constitution of the United States" as an officer in the United States Air Force. Yes, I have joined the military and it is official! There is no looking back now; no regrets, no caveats to negotiate and justify away, and no visceral knots to untie. Such a contrast from the experience I had previously! The starkness of the contrast serves as a reminder that making the right decision, especially in terms of one's own life-direction, is as much dependent upon timing as it is principle.